


Home is Where the Heart is

by mariothellama



Series: Home is where the heart is [1]
Category: Football RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Historical, Anal Sex, Falling In Love, First Time, Hand Jobs, Historical Accuracy, Kissing, Love in wartime, M/M, Opposites Attract, Oral Sex, Teasing, Thomas gets drunk and makes an idiot of himself, Thomas is actually quite serious and reflective in part of this fic, basically just an epic love story with quite a lot of sex, enigmatic seductive Robert, finding your way back home, partly set on an air base
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-10
Updated: 2017-02-10
Packaged: 2018-09-23 04:38:02
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,060
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9641057
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mariothellama/pseuds/mariothellama
Summary: Thomas was born in Bavaria, but his family took him to the US as a teenager in the 1920s. Now a pilot in the US airforce, he feels forever caught between two worlds. Posted to Great Britain, he meets Robert, a handsome, enigmatic Polish doctor similarly exiled from his homeland. They are complete opposites, but feel drawn to each other from the start. Can they finally heal their wounds and find a new, forever home in one another's arms?





	1. 1942: Thomas

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Janie94](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Janie94/gifts).



> Dear Janie94
> 
> HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!! Have a wonderful day and I look forward to many more amazing stories from you in the coming year.
> 
> And this is your birthday fic from me. Who would have thought it, a girl with schwarz-gelb blood in her veins writes pure Müllendowski! I'm still trying to recover from the shock myself. And the really crazy thing is that I really enjoyed writing Thomas like this, maybe even more than Robert, although I am definitely slightly in love with this Robert!
> 
> The thought process was 1. Can I write Müllendowski? 2. I've been picturing Thomas as a dashing US aviator since I read him as Blue_Night's Dart pilot 3. This entire monster-fic appeared in my head! (Now you know why I had to take a day off work to have any hope of finishing it in time!)
> 
> I was a bit nervous about the setting and this isn't the kind of thing I ever thought I would write. But the setting is very meaningful to me in many ways. And this is a rarity. It's one of the very few things I've written that doesn't have Marco popping up anywhere in it. And it's the only non-holiday fic I've ever written that isn't set in Germany. Part of the research involved having to dig out footage of them both speaking English to try and imagine them properly.
> 
> Note: This is basically a love story with quite a lot of sex, kind of an adult version of those old-fashioned romantic films set in the 1940s. It can be read simply as a Müllendowski love story. 
> 
> But apart from Thomas and Robert's story, everything in this fic is real and Thomas and Robert's lives are loosely based on a collection of real people. And much of what Robert tells Thomas in Chapter I is paraphrased from my great-uncle, a man who definitely earned the right to say it.

Thomas got out of the train gratefully, stretching his long, gangling limbs and straightening his uniform. The journey from the south of England had been long; they'd been halted several times and the carriage had been uncomfortably hot and crowded. He raked his fingers through his slightly too long dark-blonde hair and replaced his cap at the angle he knew made him look most rakish and dashing. Well he was a pilot, and an American one at that, so he had an image to keep up!

It was the late fall of 1942, the weather was still warm and pleasantly sunny and Thomas was glad to have a moment or two to just soak up the sun. He was in the middle of nowhere, somewhere in the north of Scotland.

He really hoped that he was in the right place. It was hard when all of the signs had been removed in the railway stations. He had had to ask one of the locals for help, not an easy task when he couldn’t even pronounce the name of the place where he was supposed to get off the train. How on earth were you meant to say Leuchars? Thomas had been relieved that he had it written down on his official US Airforce orders or he would have feared that he ran the risk of being accused of being a spy.

But then he saw a jeep draw up, squealing to a halt and a man jumped out, his long double-breasted overcoat billowing slightly behind him as he stormed over to where Thomas was standing. This man was a force of nature, Thomas thought.

‘Captain,’ said the newcomer, confidently holding out his hand to Thomas, ‘I’m Dr Lewandowski. I’m here to take you to Squadron headquarters at Dunino.’

Thomas shook the man’s hand. He was tall, dark and well-built, with piercing blue eyes. His eyes had been the first thing that Thomas noticed about him, just before it dawned on him that Dr Lewandowski might just be the best looking man he had seen in his entire life. And there was something about him, something darker, something intriguing, hidden in the depths of those blue eyes.

Thomas climbed into the jeep. ‘Dr Lewandowski?’ he asked questioningly.

‘I’m the medic currently attached to the Squadron. I’m only here for a few more weeks as I’m transferring to the Polish School of Medicine in Edinburgh. But I’ll be your liaison person and main interpreter when needed.’

Thomas nodded, settling back in his seat. He was looking forward to the next two weeks. RAF Dunino was the current operational headquarters of the No. 309 Polish Army-Cooperation Squadron who had just started flying American Mustangs as reconnaissance aircraft.

He’d heard that these guys were good. And a little crazy. One of them had proved that the operational range of the Mustang was longer than anyone believed by flying it to Norway and back without telling anyone. These sounded like Thomas’s kind of guys. And spending some time with this Dr Lewandowski and getting to know what lay behind that inscrutable façade was a not unattractive prospect either.

***

The first couple of days passed quickly in a blur of hard work and Thomas was starting to settle down and enjoy himself. It was Thomas’s third day at RAF Dunino and, as there were no missions scheduled for the next day, it was recreation evening. As was expected from a visiting American officer, he had brought gifts to share with his temporary comrades and he had managed to smuggle in a few bottles of bourbon as well.

Thomas was pleasantly drunk but still in full possession of his faculties, or so he thought, by the time he wandered over to where Dr Lewandowski was standing leaning against a wall, his arms folded and an amused smile on his face.

Thomas stumbled a little as he walked towards the dark-haired Polish doctor who put out his arms to steady him. He felt a little thrill of pleasure at the touch of the medic’s hands, but decided that leaning against the wall beside him was the most sensible course of action right now.

They stood together in silence for a moment while Thomas wracked his bourbon-fuelled brain as to how to start a conversation with the enigmatic doctor.

Eventually he asked, ‘How come you speak my language so well?’

This earned him another amused smile. ‘I’m educated, Captain. Of course I speak English. And I suspect that I speak your first language too, Captain Miller. Or should I say Müller?’

Thomas’s mouth dropped open. ‘How did you know?’

‘You’re drunk. Your accent is slipping.’

Thomas sighed. ‘You’re right. I’m from a small town near Munich. My parents immigrated to the US in ’29. I was fourteen. I always swore that I would go home one day. But … ’ he shrugged his shoulders helplessly.

‘I’m sorry.’ And Thomas had the feeling that this Dr Lewandowski really meant that.

‘You don’t mind?’ Thomas asked.

‘Why should I mind? You are your own person, neither your nationality, where you were born nor your uniform define who you are.’

‘Thank you,’ murmured Thomas, somehow resisting the urge to lean his head on the doctor’s shoulder. ‘What’s your first name? I think I’m too drunk to go on calling you Dr Lewandowski.’

‘Robert. My name is Robert.’

‘I’m Thomas. And I think I need to sit down now.’

Thomas slid down the wall until he was sitting on the floor, dragging Robert with him so that they were sitting comfortably, leaning up against each other with their backs to the wall.

Thomas offered Robert a swig from the bottle of bourbon he was still clutching. Robert drank and handed the bottle back to him. There was something mildly arousing about drinking from the same bottle, their saliva mingling on the bottle neck. He fancied that he could almost taste Robert behind the harsh sweetness of the whisky, but Thomas tried to push that thought as far away as possible.

They sat there and talked, sharing the bottle of bourbon until it was empty. Thomas had the vague recollection that he did indeed rest his head against Robert’s shoulder at some stage during the night. But then there came a point where he really didn’t remember what he said or did. That is until he woke up the next morning with no idea where he was or how he had got there.

He looked around him, ignoring the faint throbbing in his head. He appeared to be in the small, brick-built building that he knew served as the base infirmary. Had he really been that drunk? And then he peeked under the covers to see that he had been undressed except for his briefs. How did he get here? Where were his clothes? And who exactly had undressed him?

The answer to at least one of those questions came when Robert walked in whistling cheerfully.

‘Ah, I see that you are awake. You were pretty out of it last night so I thought it was safer to bring you here where I could keep an eye on you.’

That was the point at which Thomas reached the inescapable conclusion that it was Robert who had undressed him last night and neatly folded his clothes, which he now saw lying on the chair next to his bed.

‘How come I feel like shit and you look like you’ve had eight hours beauty sleep on a feather bed?’ demanded Thomas angrily.

‘Never try and outdrink a Pole, Thomas. You’ll always lose. That’s a certainty. And if that’s your seduction technique for women, to try and drink them into bed, you might want to stop drinking before you nearly lose consciousness yourself next time.’

Thomas blushed. How could he ever explain that it was the only way he had been able to get up the courage to talk to Robert privately and that he had absolutely no interest in women and was much more interested in seducing a handsome, infuriating, fascinating Polish doctor. Not that Robert would ever be interested in him. Such a good-looking, charismatic man would surely have women queuing round the block for him.

But his attention was diverted by Robert pulling back the bedclothes. Thomas instinctively clutched at them to cover his near nakedness.

‘I’m a military doctor, Thomas. I’ve seen more naked men than I care to count over the past three years. Stop being so prudish and let me examine you. I need to make sure that you are fit for duty.’

So Thomas relaxed and let Robert do his job. And he was ashamed to admit that he rather liked the feeling of Robert looking after him, not only checking his temperature and taking his blood pressure but checking him over for any injuries. Robert even massaged his temples, stroking his hand almost tenderly across Thomas’s forehead which made him want to sigh with bliss.

Maybe he was still drunk, but Robert seemed to be examining him much more thoroughly than a simple case of too much bourbon merited. And the only thing that was stopping Thomas from really enjoying this was the nagging worry that his badly behaved dick might show far too much interest in what was going on and there was no way he could hide _that_ wearing nothing but his briefs.

Luckily Robert declared himself satisfied before Thomas could embarrass himself beyond redemption. He handed him a glass of water with some powder fizzing in it and a couple of tablets.

‘Here, take these. They’ll help your stomach and your head. The bathroom is over there if you need it. I’ll be back in ten minutes with our breakfasts.’

Thomas wanted to protest that there was no way he could eat, but Robert wasn’t the kind of man you argued with. And when Robert came back with a breakfast tray and a pot of steaming hot coffee, Thomas felt suddenly hungry. It helped that Robert stayed and ate with him. This felt cosy, almost domestic.

Eventually Robert got up. Maybe this was Thomas’s overactive imagination running riot again, but Robert seemed almost reluctant to leave.

‘I can discharge you now you’ve eaten. I’ll let you get washed and dressed now. I’ve left you some of my underwear. It should fit you, if a flash US flyboy like you doesn’t mind wearing RAF issue briefs that is.’

Thomas opened his mouth to protest until he realised that Robert was winding him up. And the awful truth was that the thought of wearing Robert’s underwear was a bit of a turn on. Thomas really needed to get a grip on himself. He was losing his reason over this man, behaving like a teenager with a crush on a film star rather than a fully grown and mature adult.

***

Thomas had been prepared to give Dr Lewandowski a wide berth after that to avoid embarrassing himself any further. But Robert seemed to seek him out, far more than was strictly necessary for work purposes. They often ate together in the small hut that was used as the officers’ mess, sitting together companionably after dinner. Robert wasn’t exactly talkative and he spent far too much time regarding Thomas with curiosity for his comfort, but he enjoyed spending time with him. Robert was somehow challenging and comforting at the same time. Being with him made Thomas feel relaxed, but also very uneasy.

Everything changed on his tenth day at Dunino. The squadron were away flying a reconnaissance mission over France, flying low under heavy cloud cover. This was always risky. He saw Robert sitting out on the grass, next to the primitive runway, his eyes restlessly scanning the sky.

Thomas went over to him. ‘Can I join you’?

Robert nodded.

‘Waiting is always hard,’ said Thomas. He knew that was completely inadequate as a conversational gambit, but he had to say something.

‘Yes it is.’

‘I’m not used to being the one waiting. It’s somehow worse being on this end.’ And Thomas meant that. He had only known these men for ten days, but their enthusiasm and their commitment was infectious and he desperately hoped that they would all make it back safely.

‘Then we’ll wait together, Thomas.’

And that was the day that they really started talking to each other, talking as they waited. Robert told him all about his childhood in Warsaw, about his family, about his studies at the university there, about his youthful hopes and dreams for the future. He had just turned twenty-five, a newly qualified doctor when all that came to an end, when his world was shattered, perhaps forever.

Thomas didn’t need to ask how Robert had ended up here. He had asked some of the men. They were proud of their medic and only too glad to tell his tale.

He already knew that Robert had made his way to France and served as a doctor with General Maczek’s 10th Armoured Brigade. In June 1940, their numbers decimated, cut off behind the lines, what was left of the Brigade had split into small groups, some of whom had made their way to Great Britain to join the newly formed 1st Polish Corps, Robert along with them.

But he valued hearing Robert himself talk about his life, about what was important to him. That was real, what really mattered, even if it was sometimes so very painful.

And then Robert had asked him an unexpected question, ‘What about you, Thomas? Who are you?’

Thomas didn’t know why he wanted to tell this man about things he hadn’t spoken about for years, about things he’d kept tightly bottled up, that he had to keep locked up inside. They came from very different backgrounds, they were so very different, but somehow they seemed to understand each other.

‘I was fourteen when we left Germany in 1929. We had family in the US, it seemed more stable, there were more opportunities even despite the Great Depression. And we naturalised as US citizens eight years later.

I didn’t want to go to America. I always wanted to go home. I always believed that I would go home. I kept my first language, I never wanted to lose it, even though most German immigrants of my generation did so as quickly as possible.

My dream was to go home to study, to go to university in Munich. Even now, in here,’ and at this Thomas pointed to his heart, ‘I still feel Bavarian. Even after everything. Is that wrong of me?’

Robert turned to look at him with those astonishing blue eyes and Thomas could see the understanding and the sympathy there. ‘No Thomas. It’s not wrong. It’s human. It’s who you are. You just can’t tell many people that.’

Thomas nodded and then he said the thing that was weighing on his mind, the thing that had been eating him up for so long, the thing that he thought he would never say to anyone.

‘I hated my parents for taking me away, for making me an American against my will. But if they hadn’t, I wouldn’t be sitting here wearing this uniform. I’d be wearing a different uniform … ‘

He didn’t need to explain, Robert knew exactly what he meant.

‘We’re all human, Thomas. Under every uniform there is somebody’s son, somebody’s brother, somebody’s sweetheart. It’s who we are, what we do that matters.’

‘Can you really believe that, Robert? After everything that’s happened. After everything you’ve seen?’

‘It’s not easy sometimes, but that’s exactly why I have to believe it. I need to retain my faith in humanity, otherwise none of this makes sense and it’s all pointless. I’m a doctor. All I ever wanted to do was to save lives and help people.’

Thomas really wanted to reach across and squeeze Robert’s hand, but he contented himself with a shy smile.

They sat there until they saw the first returning planes on the horizon, standing up to crane their necks to try and see how many there were. Exactly the same ritual took place at airbases the whole world over, counting the planes home again. Thomas forgot himself when he realised that they had all made it back, flinging his arms round Robert’s neck. And Robert didn’t pull away. Instead he wrapped his arms round Thomas and pulled him close, holding him tightly for a long moment, a moment that was far longer than it really should have been.


	2. A first time for everything

Thomas went for a walk after dinner that night, he needed to be alone, need to calm his turbulent thoughts. He was leaning against the rear of one of the aircraft hangers when he heard footsteps coming towards him. It was Robert. Closing on him like a mighty predator on his nighttime hunt. Thomas had the sudden, unsettling feeling that he might just be Robert’s prey.

He knew that he was Robert’s quarry the moment he saw him close up. His eyes were dark and hooded, his handsome face set in hard lines. Robert had never looked so attractive, or so dangerous. Thomas swallowed hard, wondering where this was going.

Robert stalked up to him, placing one hand either side of his shoulders, braced against the wall of the hangar, effectively trapping him. Thomas could feel the heat emanating from his body. He could smell Robert’s soap and cologne as well as a hint of the tempting masculine scent that lay behind. Thomas was strong but he didn’t fancy fighting Robert to get out of this situation, nor did he really want to.

What happened next took Thomas completely by surprise. Robert leaned in, capturing Thomas’s lips in an aggressive, bruising kiss. Robert’s lips were slightly roughened but they felt so good, warm and supple against Thomas. Thomas couldn’t help leaning in for more, even daring to dart the tip of his tongue out to taste Robert’s lips.

But the dark-haired man drew back, gazing at Thomas with lustful fire burning in his eyes. ‘I’ve seen how you look at me. Undressing me with your eyes. Imagining how I would look naked. You want this, don’t you?’

Robert punctuated his statement by roughly squeezing the growing bulge in Thomas’s groin after each sentence. All Thomas could do was groan and he really couldn’t deny a word that Robert was saying; he had pretty much read Thomas’s thoughts.

Robert leaned in close, nipping at Thomas’s earlobe, licking inside his ear with a wet tongue, whispering hotly in his ear, ‘You want this. I know that you want this. But all you have to do is to say no and I’ll stop.’

Thomas had absolutely no intention of telling Robert to stop. He was panting hard as he felt a hand undoing his fly buttons and slipping inside his briefs. He moaned hard as he felt Robert’s hand encircling his aching cock. He butted his hips forward, urgently seeking more friction, but Robert simply chuckled, ‘Don’t be so impatient my handsome flyboy.’

Thomas made an embarrassingly loud squeaking noise in response, a sound that devolved into even more embarrassing mewls as Robert caressed the sensitive, leaking tip of his cock with a calloused thumb over and over again. He was on the verge of completely abandoning his dignity and begging for release, when Robert finally showed mercy and closed his hand round his cock.

This felt so good. The circumstance were unusual to say the least, but there was no way Thomas could hold back. He stood there, his back to the wall, his legs bent and spread as open as possible in this position, panting and breathing heavily as Robert stroked him to his climax. He took a moment to recover before rearranging his clothing, looking intently at Robert to see what he wanted.

Robert’s voice dropped to a low, dangerous purr, ‘I hope that a dashing pilot like you isn’t going to leave a poor Polish doctor unsatisfied. That’s not how heroes behave in the films.’

Thomas could never resist a challenge like that, so he span Robert round so that his back was now against the wall, reaching inside Robert’s trousers almost greedily. Robert let out an involuntary grunt in response.

The weight of his cock felt just so good in Thomas’s hand, hot, hard and heavy. Thomas loved the sensation of it lying steel hard against his palm and whispering silken against his fingers. And he loved how Robert felt coming all over his hand, pulsing wet and twitching in his fingers, unable to keep back his satisfied moans any longer.

Thomas cleaned his hand off on his handkerchief, offering it to Robert as well, who accepted the offer gratefully.

At first he thought Robert would leave without saying anything further, but Robert stayed where he was, seeming to be waiting for something. Thomas had no idea what Robert wanted, but this unnerved him. Maybe that was why it happened? He wasn’t really sure what had got into him, maybe he was drunk on Robert’s presence, maybe still light headed from his powerful orgasm, but the question just tumbled out, ‘Have you even been all the way … with a man I mean?’

It was only after he’d spoken that he realised that was an unfair question, that the answer could get Robert into much more trouble than what they had just done.

But Robert just gazed at him coolly and answered simply, ‘Yes, of course I have.’

‘I haven’t. Will you? I mean … I want to know what it feels like … even if only just once … In case … well in case … ’

He held his breath, chewing his lip nervously waiting for Robert’s answer.

He expected Robert to say no, or at least to tease him a bit more, but Robert only looked at him with a sudden softness in his eyes, ‘Of course, Thomas. It would be my honour.’ And then Robert turned and walked away.

‘W-w-w-w-hat?’ stammered Thomas.

Robert turned his head, an unreadable expression in his eyes but with a smile on his lips, ‘You don’t expect me to take the virginity of a brave flyboy out here against the wall of an aircraft hangar, do you?’

Actually that was exactly what Thomas had expected, but he was willing to go along with whatever Robert had in mind so he followed him.

***

They went to the small infirmary building. Robert locked the main door behind them. ‘They’ll ring the bell if there is an emergency overnight,’ he explained in response to Thomas’s questioning look. And then he led Thomas to the small room at the rear that seemed to be both Robert’s office and where he slept.

Thomas looked around him, suddenly nervous.

‘I-I-I could do with using the bathroom first,’ he stammered. Stammering seemed to be his thing today. ‘And I could do with cleaning up a bit too.’ This was all true, but he was nervous as well and wanted to stall things for a bit.

‘Good idea,’ smiled Robert, his white teeth glinting wolfishly under the harsh yellow light of the unshaded electric bulb, ‘I could do with doing the same. Why don’t you go and make yourself comfortable and then we can wash together?’ Robert put a stress on the word _together_ that sent shivers running down Thomas’s spine.

Thomas saw to his bodily needs in the small bathroom attached to Robert’s office and waited to see what would happen next.

His jaw dropped as Robert walked in stark naked. Not only had Thomas not expected this, but suddenly Robert was all male, hard-muscled and hungry looking, a predator once again. He seemed so much more threatening and dangerous than he had outside now all that masculine energy was pent up within these four walls. And he was even more gorgeous and desirable than Thomas had imagined in his most lurid fantasies.

This was the man who was going to take his virginity, Thomas realised with a jolt. This was all very real, exciting and scary at the same time. Thomas had been prepared to be taken roughly against the wall of an aircraft hangar. He had been prepared for it to be uncomfortable, even painful, but he had wanted to experience this at least once in his life. But this was so much more overwhelming than a quick, rough fuck would have been.

Thomas went to leave as Robert stalked over to the toilet, but an amused voice stopped him, ‘We’re about to get a lot more physically intimate than you watching me pee, Thomas. And we’ve both spent years in the army or the air force. This is nothing new for either of us. But you can turn your back if that makes you feel more comfortable.’

Thomas swallowed. Robert was right. Normally this was no big deal to him. It was only the fact that it was Robert that made it so unsettlingly intimate.

He was intoxicated by Robert’s strong masculine aura, it made him feel almost dizzy. This was what he had so desperately wanted for so long now, even if he had scarcely been able to admit it, even to himself. He wanted to feel the faint scratch of stubble as he was kissed. To feel the hard muscled planes of a male body pressed up against him. To feel strong arms holding him and big, male hands caressing his naked skin. And, not to beat about the bush, he was suddenly sure that he really did want a big, hard cock in his virgin ass, more specifically Robert’s. That thought aroused and terrified Thomas in more or less exactly equal measures.

So Thomas didn’t turn his back. And he didn’t look away either, gazing instead at the sculpted lines of Robert’s back and his perfect buttocks. And he knew that Robert knew exactly what he was doing.

‘Now let’s get you out of these unnecessary clothes,’ observed Robert as he began to undress Thomas.

Robert undressed him slowly and carefully. Thomas had never thought that the simple act of having someone remove his tie could be so erotic. And then Robert undid every button on his shirt almost painfully slowly before easing it off his shoulders.

Robert barely touched him as he pulled off his undershirt and took off his trousers, but Thomas felt as if a jolt of electricity went through him every time Robert’s fingers brushed against his skin. He let out a faint, embarrassing mewling sound when Robert’s fingers nudged inside the waistband of his briefs to pull them down. Fuck, even having his socks taken off felt good when Robert did it, with Robert kneeling before him.

He stood there totally naked, goosebumps breaking out on his skin as Robert regarded him appraisingly.

‘Very nice,’ said Robert at last, before turning away to fill the basin with hot water and wet the wash cloth.

He pushed Thomas backwards against the basin so that his buttocks were pressed against the cold, hard porcelain and then he began to run the damp wash cloth over Thomas’s flushed skin.

And if being undressed by Robert had been erotic, being washed by him was even more arousing. They had done nothing explicitly sexual since they had entered Robert’s office, but the feeling of Robert running the wet cloth over his torso, his arms, over his thighs had made him rock hard again, even though it was not long since he had come.

He shivered as Robert washed him intimately, between his thighs, his balls, between his buttocks, cleaning him up where he had come all over himself. He had never imagined anything like this, not even in his wildest dreams.

And then it was his turn to wash Robert, his hand trembling as he stroked over the contours of Robert’s strongly set shoulders, his broad chest, those heavily muscled thighs. And it gave him courage to hear Robert moan softly as Thomas touched his most private parts, to know that Robert took pleasure from his simple touch.

Once they were clean and dry, Robert eased him down on the narrow camp bed. Thomas tensed involuntarily, mentally preparing himself for what would happen next.

The bed creaked under both their weight as Robert lowered himself on top of Thomas. The feel of Robert’s body against him was just so overwhelming that Thomas half-expected there to be a hissing sound as their naked skin touched for the first time. Robert shifted himself just a little, moving himself to ensure that their bare cocks rubbed together. This was unbelievably good.

But then Robert did something unexpected again. He kissed Thomas slowly and thoroughly, exploring his mouth with his tongue, finding every sensitive spot that made Thomas sigh when Robert licked over it. Robert had shaved carefully that morning and his skin was still smooth and fragrant, but with just a hint of dark stubble that scratched deliciously.

Somehow Thomas had expected this all to be rougher, more threatening, less, well less like making love; not like this, being slowly undressed, gently washed and then kissed tenderly and passionately.

Thomas knew it was time when Robert looked him, his eyes darkened with lust. But he didn’t fear Robert anymore. He was intoxicating, desirable and exciting, but no longer threatening

‘I’ll look after you. I promise,’ Robert said reassuringly. ‘It’ll feel strange at first, a little uncomfortable. But that will fade away and you’ll feel good, so good. I promise you.’

While he was still nervous, Thomas trusted Robert and tried to relax. There was a sharp intake of breath as he felt Robert’s slippery fingers massaging him between his buttocks. No one had touched him there before and he hadn’t expected it to be so good. The gentle pressure became more urgent and then he felt a finger entering him for the first time. And it felt surprisingly OK. It even felt, well it felt kind of nice.

‘OK?’ breathed Robert.

‘More than OK,’ answered Thomas.

Thomas closed his eyes and spread his legs as best as he could on the narrow bed, wanting, needing more despite the unfamiliar sensation of having something inside him. He winced slightly as Robert penetrated him with a second finger, but he didn’t want Robert to stop. He could sense that there was something more, he could feel the promise of deeper, more intense pleasure licking inside him.

And then it was there. A sharp jolt of pleasure that felt different to anything that Thomas had ever felt before as Robert unerringly felt for a special spot inside him.

His eyes flew open. ‘W-w-w-w-hat?’ he squeaked.

‘There are some advantages to having sex with a doctor,’ Robert chuckled.

And Robert had been right. It still felt a little strange and uncomfortable, but it felt good as Robert began to gently thrust his fingers in and out of Thomas’s tight, virgin passage. His breath hitched as Robert used three fingers, but he could take it, especially when Robert every so often brushed his fingers over that place that made him see stars each time.

‘You feel so perfect, Thomas. This is going to be amazing. You’re taking this so well, just so well. I’m so proud of you,’ Robert encouraged as he withdrew his fingers and positioned himself over Thomas’s body.

He flinched as he felt the tip to Robert’s cock nudging against his entrance, saying the first stupid thing that crossed his mind, ‘But you’re so big. How will …?’

Robert’s voice was raw with desire, but there was still a warmth in it as he answered.

‘Thank you for the compliment. But it will fit. And very snugly. Just relax and let me in. Keep breathing. The first part is the hardest. But it will be good. You’ll never forget this, I promise you.’

And he was right yet again. Thomas had to force himself to stay calm as he felt the sharp sting of Robert pushing into him, followed by the low burn of Robert sinking carefully inside.

Thomas had shut his eyes once more, but Robert’s voice called him back, ‘Open your eyes. Don’t try and block it out. Be present. This is a special moment, one to be cherished, one never to be forgotten.’

Robert paused when he was fully inside Thomas, giving both of them a moment to adjust. Despite the fact that being stretched and filled to the limit was still slightly uncomfortable, Thomas was elated. He had done it. He had taken Robert. He could feel Robert’s pubic bone pressed hard against his flesh. He could feel the comforting weight of Robert’s balls against his skin. Thomas had to suppress a smile; Robert really was buried balls deep inside him.

The camp bed was small and creaky, but Thomas had the distinct suspicion that that wasn’t the only reason why Robert thrust into him gently and slowly, almost tenderly if that was an appropriate word. But it was enough for the friction to gently build, for the gorgeous feeling of Robert’s cock repeatedly rubbing over that special spot inside him to begin to drive Thomas crazy,

This was good, really good. Strange and new, but so intense and just so deeply, amazingly, unbelievably pleasurable. He felt filled and complete like never before. It felt as if Robert was invading every cell of his body, the pleasure radiating up his spine and out through his limbs. He was aching to come but everything was so overwhelming that he didn’t know if he would be able to without help.

‘Robert. I … I … I don’t know if I can … ’he tried to stammer out his concerns to Robert.

But Robert just reassured him yet again, ‘Don’t worry about it. Just enjoy the experience, enjoy how it feels. Enjoy someone coming inside you for the first time. I’ll make sure you're OK afterwards.’

So Thomas did. Enjoying the delicious feeling of Robert steadily thrusting inside him. Enjoying watching Robert let go with a strangled cry, watching his face scrunch up in ecstasy as he came deep inside Thomas. And that felt surprisingly good, the feeling of Robert twitching and spurting inside him, the feeling of being completely taken, possessed and claimed for the first time

And it was only a moment later, after he had gently pulled out of Thomas’s no longer virgin body, that Robert glided down to taken him in his mouth. This was fucking perfect, thought Thomas as he felt a willing mouth round him. He wasn’t going to last long and he made no attempt to do so as he came with an equally strangled cry of his own.

He enjoyed the precious moments in Robert’s arms afterwards. Thomas longed to go to sleep here, to sleep held snug in Robert’s arms. But he knew that wasn’t part of the deal and anyway he would be missed. He went to try and get up, but Robert’s arms held him firmly in place.

‘I need to go. I’ll be missed.’

He felt Robert’s warm breath wafting against his hair as he asked, ‘But do you want to go?’

Even if he was risking humiliation, Thomas couldn’t do anything but tell the truth, ‘No, I want to stay here, in your arms.’

‘Well then. I’ll say that you had a fever and I needed to keep you here for observation overnight. That’s not a total lie. You were incredibly hot tonight.’ Robert laughed softly at this and Thomas couldn’t help joining in. And then Robert went on more seriously, ‘And you really shouldn’t be alone after your first time. But it’s a narrow bed and we’ll need to sleep very, very close together, I warn you.’

‘I think that I can cope with that,’ smiled Thomas.

This was one of the best nights of Thomas’s life. They lay together, held tight in one another’s arms, talking until the early hours of the morning, Robert massaging the base of his spine and his buttocks to ease the lingering ache there. And he slept better in Robert’s arms than he had for years, despite the hard, narrow camp bed and the fact that neither of them were exactly small and they slept in a complicated tangle of intermingled limbs.

That all made saying goodbye even more difficult after they had breakfasted the next morning. Thomas had asked Robert for this one single time and Robert had given him more than he could ever have hoped for. He really would remember this night forever. But now it was over.

Robert’s voice stopped him as he was exiting the infirmary, the door already held open.

Robert spoke loudly, ‘Captain Miller! You’re cleared for duty. But I’d like to keep you in the infirmary overnight, just for observation, until you leave. I don’t want to run the risk of you returning to your unit unfit.’

And then he walked up to Thomas, the next sentence intended only for him to hear, ‘And keep your fingers crossed that everyone stays healthy and nobody else needs to overnight in the infirmary.’

***

Their luck held and they were able to spend their last few nights together alone.

Robert refused to make love to Thomas again the second night, even though Thomas begged him to.

‘Your body needs time to recover. But there are so many other pleasurable things that we can do.’

And Thomas had to admit that Robert was right when he felt just how good Robert’s mouth felt on him, hot, wet and tight round him. Robert was truly skilled at this, sucking Thomas deep into his mouth, the pressure driving him inexorably to his orgasm while his tongue stimulated every sensitive spot. Thomas had never come in someone’s mouth before the previous night and he automatically tried to pull away, but Robert held him still, swallowing as Thomas came with his hand clutching at Robert’s hair, saying his name over and over again.

Thomas lay there a little unsure afterwards. He longed to taste Robert in this way, but he knew that he was nowhere near as experienced and skilled as the doctor and he was worried that his efforts would be disappointing.

Robert seemed to sense what was concerning him. ‘It’s up to you, Thomas. Do whatever you want to. It’ll feel good no matter what because it’s you. Just make me come, that’s all you need to do.’

Emboldened by this, Thomas knelt down on the floor next to the low bed. Robert moving so that his body was in the position that would make it easiest for Thomas, lying slightly on his side.

He ran his tongue over the inside of Robert’s thighs before moving up to lick his balls, massaging them with his tongue, taking them in his mouth and sucking until he heard Robert moan. His nose was buried deep in Robert’s pubic hair like this and that turned him on even more. Robert smelled so enticing, so exotic, male and musky as he moaned harder and harder in response to the attentions of Thomas’s mouth, making no attempt to hide just how much he was enjoying this.

Thomas licked over the length of Robert’s shaft, loving how the satiny smooth, salty skin moved over the hard steel beneath under the pressure from his tongue. And Robert tasted just so good as Thomas took the head of his cock in his mouth, lapping up the creamy fluid he had leaked. He kept on sucking and licking at the sensitive head as he closed his hand round the shaft to work Robert to his climax.

Robert was really moaning hard by this point, gasping out breathless encouragement, ‘Fuck, Thomas. That feels good. Really good. Don’t stop. Just don’t stop.’ He hooked his leg over Thomas’s shoulder, clenching his hand in his hair, pulling him hard against his crotch, ever so slightly rocking his hips against Thomas’s mouth and hand as he fought his way grunting and groaning to his orgasm.

Thomas was completely trapped now, with his face buried in Robert’s groin, and there was nowhere he would rather be as he eagerly swallowed down all the hot, thick liquid Robert fed him with. And he knew that he would have a huge, self-satisfied grin on his face as he licked the last traces of semen and saliva from his lips.

They made love the next two nights and now that Thomas knew what to expect, now that he could relax and respond to what Robert was doing to him, it felt even better, their bodies moving together in perfect unison on the small, creaking camp bed, bound together in sweaty, sticky pleasure.

But it couldn’t last forever and the day that Thomas had to leave came all too soon for both of them.

They breakfasted in silence on their last morning together. Everything that needed to be said had already been said and neither of them were in the mood for casual conversation.

Robert stood up after breakfast. ‘I’ll say goodbye to you now, here in private. Not in front of everybody.’

He bent down to Thomas one last time. ‘Look after yourself, Captain. Stay safe. And if … if you … come back and find me. That’s all I want to say.’

Robert stroked gently over Thomas’s cheek before walking out of the infirmary without looking back.


	3. 1946: Robert

It was the summer of 1946 and Robert was beginning the laborious process of packing up his office in the Medical School. He picked up the photograph he always kept on his desk of him with his old squadron. It had been taken when Thomas was there and the sight of the dark-blond captain and his cheeky grin always made him feel happy but also a little melancholy, nostalgic for the time they had spent together.

He traced over Thomas’s smiling face with his thumb. ‘I hope that you are OK wherever you are,’ he whispered, ‘and maybe I’ll see you again one day.’

There was a knock at his door.

‘Come in,’ ordered Robert absentmindedly. He didn’t look up straight away, still engrossed in the picture he was holding, but the voice he heard made him start.

‘Hallo Robert. Long time, no see.’

‘T-T-T-T-T-homas?’ he stuttered, unable to believe what he was seeing.

Thomas was out of uniform and he looked even more handsome in civilian clothes, in his perfectly cut pin-striped navy-blue suit that flattered his slim frame. He looked a little older and a little more careworn, but he still had that boyish grin that had always made Robert smile and the glint in his eye that made his heart flip.

Robert longed to kiss that stupid, cheeky grin from Thomas’s face, to bury his fingers in the tousled mop of dark-blonde hair and never let go again.

‘Alive and in person. Reporting as ordered, Dr Lewandowski. Fortunately you were quite easy to find being a famous doctor and all that.’

Robert wanted to pinch himself to make sure that he wasn’t dreaming. Yes, he had asked Thomas to come back and find him if he could. But in that dark place in his heart of hearts where he kept all of his most terrible, painful fears and memories safely locked up, he had doubted that Thomas was still alive. And, even if he was, would he want to see Robert again? Maybe he would have moved on with his life? Regretted what had happened between them? Found someone to love?

He walked forward to stand in front of Thomas and the look he saw in his eyes told him everything he needed to know. He stretched up his hand to stroke Thomas’s cheek, but he had to ask, he had to make sure, ‘Is it OK? Can I … ?’

Thomas’s answering smile almost melted Robert’s heart. ‘I only have one question. Does your office door have a lock?’

And once the door was safely locked, they fell into one another’s arms, kissing deep and passionately as if to try and make up for all the years that they had been apart, remembering how the other felt and tasted, remembering just how good and right this had felt from the very beginning. They belonged together. They had always known that deep down within their souls but the world had been too uncertain a place when they met for them to be able to admit that.

Once they had to reluctantly part to pause for breath, they stood together for a long while, enjoying the feeling of just being held close and safe in one another’s arms, listening to the other breathe, feeling their hearts beating almost in synchronicity, drinking in the familiar scent of a long-absent beloved one.

This was perfect, but Robert wanted more, he needed more, but he didn’t want to pressurise Thomas. ‘I have a couch, If you … If that isn’t too … ’ he murmured against the warm, fragrant skin of Thomas’s neck.

‘I thought you’d never ask,’ chuckled Thomas.

They made their way over to the couch, stumbling a bit as they didn’t want to let go of each other again so soon, even for a moment. They fell back onto the couch, giggling faintly as they collapsed awkwardly on top of one other, before starting to kiss again, their arousal growing as their bodies rubbed up against each other.

Robert sat up, stripping off his shirt. The sight of his well-toned body was every bit as breath-taking as it had been in Thomas’s memories. Thomas hastily unbuttoned his own shirt, shrugging it off, not caring about the fact that he was still half lying on it. He groaned out loud as he felt Robert’s hands on his groin, unbuttoning his fly and easing his trousers down. And he groaned louder as Robert stroked over the huge bulge in his briefs.

‘I need to fetch something,’ Robert said, reluctant to leave Thomas’s side but needing to get something to use as lubricant. Thankfully that was never going be a problem in a doctor’s office. ‘Why don’t you make yourself comfortable.’

Thomas stripped naked, wriggling out of his briefs and trousers and throwing them untidily onto the floor. And then he watched enthralled as Robert came back to him and finished undressing. How he had missed this sight. Robert was every bit as magnificent as he had remembered - proud, hard and erect for him and only for him.

The couch creaked faintly as Robert settled himself down on top of Thomas, one hand cradling his head, the other slipping between Thomas’s thighs to begin to caress his entrance with slick, slippery fingers.

Robert hated the thought of Thomas having been with someone else, but he had to ask, he needed to know, to know how easy this was going to be for the blond.

‘How long, Thomas? Since you … I mean … ’

Thomas looked up at him with those clear blue-green eyes. ‘There’s been no one since you, Robert. I wanted to know what it was like just once … before … in case … But after you I didn’t want to cheapen the memory of what we had by being with someone else. Not until I had tried to find you again. Not until I knew if you still wanted me or not.’

Robert had to blink away the tears that suddenly pricked his eyes. Thomas had waited for him. There had been nobody else.

He leaned down to kiss him, his voice hoarse with emotion as he whispered, ‘And if I have anything to do with it, nobody else will ever have you.’ And then he kissed Thomas, his tongue darting into his mouth as his finger thrust gently inside him, probing and caressing deep inside his velvety warmth.

Robert took his time preparing Thomas, making sure that he was completely open and relaxed. He kissed Thomas throughout, cherishing every sigh, every pitch and shift of Thomas’s body underneath him as he shivered in ecstasy, rolling his hips upwards to meet the thrusting of Robert’s fingers.

The only time he took his lips from Thomas’s was to briefly enjoy just how beautiful he looked under him, his face suffused with bliss. He swallowed down Thomas’s moans as he reached deep inside him with two fingers and his soft cries as he brushed over the bundle of nerves that could give so much pleasure. At last Thomas could take three fingers easily and Robert could wait no longer, he was achingly hard and desperate to bury himself deep inside Thomas.

‘Ready?’ he asked with a smile as he shifted himself over the body of the man he was slowly coming to admit that he loved.

Thomas didn’t answer, simply wriggled happily under Robert, raising his leg up and resting it against the back of the couch to give him easier access.

Robert held his breath as he slowly sank into Thomas, fighting to keep control. Thomas felt just so unbelievably good, hot and tight round him. Never, ever in Robert’s whole life had this felt so good. Thomas was what he wanted, all that he wanted, now and forever. And he told Thomas that over and over again as he buried himself to the hilt inside his body. He tried to remain still - not moving, just being, watching Thomas moaning and panting below him - for as long as he could, but eventually he couldn’t bear it anymore, both of them needed to come far too badly for that.

Robert barely pulled out, giving himself just enough room to circle his hips over Thomas again and again, pushing into him rather than thrusting. This gave them enough friction to blunt the edge of their need for now, but it also built their arousal into a spiraling crescendo. Robert could feel it tight in his balls, licking though his groin and up his spine, threatening to consume him in the most delicious agony. He was losing his mind now, lost in the sheer gorgeousness of Thomas’s body writhing under him.

Finally he heard Thomas’s plea, ‘Please Robert. Just fuck me. Fuck me hard. I need it so badly. It’s been so long. Please.’

How could Robert ever resist when Thomas begged like that? He reached up to where Thomas’s leg was hooked over the back of the couch, pulling it down and hooking it over his hip, turning Thomas’s body so that he could thrust deep inside him despite the restricted space, hopefully finding his prostrate. And the loud cry that Thomas let out after a few thrusts told him that he had been successful in his mission.

He thrust hard and steady into Thomas, keeping up the relentless pressure on his prostrate. Even though it had been so long, he was determined to make Thomas come untouched this first time that they were finally together again. The loud gasping and whining noises Thomas was making, the sensation of his walls trembling and convulsing round him, the feeling of Thomas’s cock twitching wetly against his abdomen all told him that he was close.

Robert gathered the last of his stamina and thrust deep, hard and true into Thomas several times, getting his reward as Thomas arched his back with a loud cry, spurting his release all over Robert’s belly. And that was enough to make Robert let go, coming deep inside Thomas, claiming the man he never wanted to let go of again.

***

They lay together afterwards, holding each other close under a blanket that Robert had pulled over them.

It was Thomas who eventually broke the silence. ‘I’m sorry, Robert, about Warsaw I mean. Your home.’

‘Everything I ever knew is gone, completely and utterly destroyed. I would still have gone back. The city will survive and be rebuilt and I long to be part of that. But I can’t. People like me aren’t welcome now. Politics. The irony is that we won but my homeland is not yet truly free. The story of the last few hundred years of Polish history, I guess.’ Robert shrugged, trying to be accepting but the pain and the loss were audible in his voice.

‘What will you do?’

‘I’ll stay here. There will be a new National Health Service offering free healthcare for all. Doctors are needed. That is a dream that I can be part of, something that I can be proud off. Something worthwhile to live for.

And what about you, Thomas? Where is home now?’

Thomas was silent for a moment. Sensing that this was painful for him, Robert simply held him, stroking his back soothingly.

‘I finally made it back to Munich. In August last year. What I had dreamed of all these years. So much was destroyed. It was heartbreaking. And I was wearing the uniform of an occupying army. That’s when I realised that I could never go back, that it would always feel like home, but that it could never be my home again, not now.’

‘What will you do? Go back to the States?’

‘That kind of depends on you, I suppose. I don’t really feel at home in the US either now, especially not now that I have been away for so long. I was thinking about completing my education, finally going to University. And if Munich isn’t an option, why not Edinburgh?’

Robert almost couldn’t believe what he was hearing. ‘I have a flat here. I had a lodger, but he has recently moved on. So I was looking for a new lodger in any case.

We need to be very, very careful. The world is shifting and becoming more conservative and judgmental once again. But nobody would ever know if my lodger slipped into my bedroom to share my large, comfortable bed of a night.’

Thomas laughed. ‘You mean that we will finally get to sleep somewhere that is actually big enough for both of us to lie down comfortably?’

‘Is that a yes?’

‘Of course.’

And at that they kissed, sweetly and passionately, sealing their new future together. Both of them had lost so much, although many had lost so much more than they had, they knew that. But somehow, against all the odds, they had found their way back to each other and now it was time to make a new home, to find healing and truth and meaning in that old, oft-quoted proverb: home is where the heart is.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Robert's story is also the story of the first major wave of Polish immigration to the UK. Most of the remaining Polish forces made their way to Great Britain after the summer of 1940. The vast majority - about 38,000 soldiers, sailors and airmen - were posted to Scotland. Four air squadrons were based in Scotland and it was the training and home base of the the main Polish army units as members of the 1st Polish Corps. 
> 
> Because they were spread all over Scotland and were responsible for coastal defence in the north east, they had a lot of contact with the population and were warmly welcomed. Many Polish units adopted the Scottish thistle or the lion alongside the Polish eagle on their insignia. It was partially because of the large number of medical officers with the 1st Polish Corps, that the Polish School of Medicine was founded at the University of Edinburgh and operated between 1941 and 1949. It was said to be the only Polish institute of higher education in existence in the world between the years 1941-45.
> 
> Sadly their story doesn't end 100% happily. Almost none of them were ever able to go home and the mood turned a little more hostile towards them in their adopted country in the post-war years. General Maczek - whose name has not been celebrated by history perhaps as much as is deserved except for in the parts of the Netherlands and Belgium where he is still remembered today - was stripped of his Polish citizenship and lived in Edinburgh with his family until his death in 1994 (aged 102!) including a period working as a barman in a hotel. He was made an honorary Dutch citizen in recognition of his achievements and chose to be buried with his men in the Polish military cemetery at Breda.
> 
> There was an upsurge in German immigration to the US after 1920, around 430,000 German immigrants arrived in the US between 1918 and 1933. Unlike previous generations, these immigrants tended to anglicise their names and lose their language to assimilate, like our Thomas Miller/Müller's family here.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Black Valentine](https://archiveofourown.org/works/9718478) by [Blue_Night](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blue_Night/pseuds/Blue_Night)




End file.
